I was at a table quiz in Kilkenny last night. It was a fundraiser for the first ever Kilkenny Pride, or Not The Only Gay in the Village, or something to that effect.
Perhaps we were arrogant in our approach, but our team really did come acropper on some of the questions. They were much more difficult than what we had envisaged. For future reference, James the Tank Engine is red, ascorbic acid is better known as vitamin C, the chicken is the most common bird in the world and the stomach is the human organ that is capable of expanding to twenty times it's normal size.
The event was compared by that delightful tart, Joanna Ryde. At the end of the tenth round of questioning a guy got up from one of the tables and made for the door. Seeing him leave, Joanna said "Goodbye Stephen", urging everyone in the pub to respond "Goodbye Stephen!" At this point I said, perhaps a little too loudly given my proximity to Joanna's microphone, "Isn't Kilkenny lovely, all the gays know each other by their first names!"
Silence descended, followed by first uneasy, then hysterical laughter. From the corner of my mouth I muttered "Start the car, Frank."
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